During our Father’s Day sermon, Pastor Alex challenged us to bless our Heavenly Father as well as our earthly father. Pastor took us through the long list of God’s benefits, love, and blessings recorded in Psalm 103. In verses 2-4, the psalmist credits God with forgiveness, healing, redemption, love, and compassion. The verses that follow further describe what God does for us: renewal, righteousness, justice, and undeserved forgiveness (v. 5-12). One aspect of God’s character that resonated with me was His fatherly compassion and love, described in Psalm 103:13-18. I have often experienced that fatherly compassion as God helped me wade through grief in my life. And this Father’s Day, after reflecting on my grief, I changed my focus to thanking my Heavenly Father.

When I was eleven, my father died in a plane crash. Except for that Father’s Day days after his death, my mother never let us stay home from a church service. From then on, I disliked any sermons that talked about fathers. I hated any reminder that my Dad had died—my adventurous loving father who adored my siblings and me. In my teen years, when I heard things about fathers, I could not relate. My family included Mom and the three of us siblings; that was all. I avoided dredging up memories of my Dad, because remembering felt painful. Instead, I lived in the moment, and Jesus helped me move forward past grief.

Thirty-plus years later, I faced my biggest fear when tragedy happened again. Lee, the love of my life and husband of eighteen years, died suddenly of a heart attack. I became a widow and only parent to our children, who were six and eight years old at the time. For many years, I kept my kids home from Father’s Day services to avoid hearing about the importance of fathers. We grieved that reality daily as we missed and reminisced about their wonderful Daddy.

I haven’t boycotted services or had a Father’s Day pity party related to grief for over a decade. God helped me process my grief and gave me opportunities to share His comfort in my writing and speaking. My life is very different now. But when Pastor Alex presented God’s actions and character in Psalm 103 as reasons to bless God, I felt convicted. I remembered past pity parties on Father’s Day. The Holy Spirit convicted me of those times I had focused on my loss and not on my Savior.

As Pastor Alex spoke, I realized that God deserves ongoing praise for how He forgave, redeemed, and restored me. How could I spend Father’s Day ignoring what my Heavenly Father had done for me? God’s comfort and provision had carried me through the challenges of widowhood and only-parenting. Jesus had walked me through the valley of the shadow of death, when I didn’t think I would survive grief. I had often spent Father’s Day ruminating on what I had lost instead of being thankful for my Heavenly Father.

Lord God, forgive me for those Father’s Days when I wallowed in my sorrow. Please forgive my selfish perspective and the times I didn’t honor you. Thank you for lifting my head above the grief and showing me how to rely on you. Lord God, you are my one and only Heavenly Father. If you had not sacrificed your only son Jesus, I would not be your child. Thank you that you love and forgive me when I don’t deserve it. Heavenly Father, make my future Father’s Days times of giving thanks for your help, healing, and forgiveness. Help me to praise and honor you—on Father’s Day and always. In Jesus’ name. Amen.