March, 2020. Coronavirus chaos. COVID-19-related lockdown. A pandemic that stopped everything. No people to see or places to go. No stuff to do. My calendar of activities blanked out. Everything in my life got reorganized.
God, is this pandemic part of your plan?! Shouldn’t I be going, doing, meeting, etc.? Aren’t those activities the work you planned for me to do?
What an inopportune time for this to be happening. So I thought seven months ago when coronavirus chaos set in and the COVID-19 lockdown began. After moving to a new community, my husband and I involved ourselves in a church—really involved, as in four nights a week, some daytime commitments, occasional extra activities. In our previous town, we lived within a mile of our church. From our rural home, we drive 25 minutes for church, groceries, or anything. Until COVID-19 stopped our schedule.
God, what can I possibly learn from being stuck at home?! Yes, I am grateful to be healthy, but now what?
As an extrovert, this is not my lifestyle. I miss people! Especially kids. This is an empty-nester isolation sentence: no Sunday school to teach, no youth group to help, no kids in our neighborhood. I could be doing something important.
God, this is like a painful reorg! You took my current life’s org chart and wiped out the connected boxes.
A reorg (reorganization) happens in order to restructure an organization for growth, efficiency, expansion—or even reduction. The goal is to maximize the company’s resources, strategies, and people for improved outcomes. When you work at the bottom of the chart, as I often have, a new org chart brings surprises. Where did people go? Who am I stuck with on my team? Why can’t I be on the other side with that person/team/salary? What happened to the higher-ups that I trust?
God, I don’t like this coronavirus reorg. Why did you have to shake-up my life?
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24
Dear Lord, let me submit to your reorg of my life, my activities, my schedule, and my networks. I may not like the disconnections or the uprooting, but teach me to submit. Convict me where I need to be convicted, and turn my selfish heart away from sinful attitudes and actions.
Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near. Let the wicked forsake their ways and the unrighteous their thoughts. Let them turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on them, and to our God, for he will freely pardon. “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:6-9
Dear Lord, I feel trapped, unproductive, and frustrated. Forgive me for my bad attitude and reluctance to learn. Forgive me for taking my health for granted when so many are ill and dying. A contemplative attitude and reflection are tough for me. Please help me to focus on studying your Word, following your guidance, and obeying you. Change my priorities and pursuits to align with your ways. Your will be done. In Jesus’ name. Amen.